Just A Word
by Ana89mika
Summary: AU-ish. Just a one-shot. Actually, better considered a drabble...sorta. An experiment to see if I can use limited words to portray heavy emotions. Shortest work yet. Give it a read...you might be surprised. Hopefully!


**A/N: A one-shot attempt. **

**I have tried something in this piece. **

**Limited words but exaggerated expressions. **

**Don't know if it came out that way, but please leave a review. **

**Trigger Warning: Could set off emotional response. But nothing detailed, so I hope not to cause anyone any distress. **

**No right on the characters, whatsoever. The content is my creation though. **

**Mistakes are all on me. This is my first trial using second-person so there could be some errors. **

**Hope you all like it. And approach it with an open mind, please. **

* * *

_No other weapon more powerful and treacherous than time,_

_Devastation at its hands may ensue with the very next chime._

_(No one famous, just mine)_

* * *

_**Just A Word**_

* * *

You stare. You continue to stare, you simply have no choice.

No. You don't want to give yourself a choice. So, you stare.

Openly and shamelessly.

You doubt you put your eyes to a better use before, if ever.

Regina. Regina Mills.

Not one stroke of brush out of place. Not one splash of color a waste.

A piece of art so magnificent, so imperfectly perfect, that it shatters an artist's will. There can be no other.

She is the definition of beauty, the sole personification of beauty. The landmark against all things naturally beautiful; anywhere and everywhere.

And due to some bizarre stroke of luck, this goddess has agreed to give you a chance.

That moment Regina Mills becomes your first, last, and the only opportunity at life.

* * *

You fall. Every second, every minute, every hour of every day, you feel yourself falling deeper and deeper.

It's breathtakingly exhilarating, sure. But it's also terrifyingly daunting, scary.

Regina is your plain paper, your pristine white, fresh canvas.

Regina is your new beginning, years later to the actual beginning.

Regina is your conscience, your thought, your new obsession.

Regina is now your ocean. Open, welcoming, tempting, flowing with anticipation.

Because, you conclude, from this day forward; Regina Mills is your '_forever_'.

You know that now.

And so, you want to dig yourself deeper, still; deeper than forever.

You still have to accept it, acknowledge it, declare it; but you know that now.

* * *

You have basically stopped trying. Trying to put words to Regina's beauty.

You have settled with marveling at it. You have learned to be amazed by it, in silence.

You smile when she smiles.

You laugh, without any reason, when she laughs.

You cry, without reason, simply because she cries.

Each passing day, you relinquish yet another inch of control over to her.

You watch her eyes crinkle in delight at corners; she laughs softly at something on the television.

Like every day, you are physically swayed by the feeling of belonging to someone so wonderful.

You feel free, liberated by the level of ease, comfort you share with her.

Your insides stir dangerously, restlessly. Itching to say those three little, precious words.

Your soul overpowers you, wanting to seal its fate, in this life and all the lives to come, without wait.

And just like that, on the couch at Regina's place, in front of the television, those words tumble out of your mouth in a hushed whisper.

Without any warning, without your consent, without permission, without preamble.

You cringe when you see blankness befall Regina's features. Her eyes staring ahead, unblinking, and body rigid, tense.

You berate yourself for complete and utter lack of self control.

Regina turns her head to look at you, directly in your eyes.

You can see the doubt seeping in the soft brown hue of her eyes. They are pouring with trepidation.

You try to temper her anxiety, you smile.

"I love you, Regina," you finally declare.

A moment later, she smiles. Her eyes now alight and wet. "And I love you, Emma," she softly returns.

* * *

Your heart clenches painfully. Your stomach churns in distaste. The bitter lump of bile is sitting, resting at the back of your throat for the time being.

Doctor's reports crease in your strong fingers.

You remind yourself that it's better this way.

Realistically though, you know it's not.

Even coming from you, it won't soften the blow, it can't.

How do you tell a woman, she is eternally barren?

How do you break somebody's dream and expect no retaliation?

You risk it. You fear it, but you need to risk it.

Your left cheek is stinging. You suspect her right palm must be too.

You didn't anticipate the slap, but that doesn't stop you from embracing her shaking, all of a sudden surprisingly small, and brittle form.

She pushes against you, kicks at you, and keeps pushing you away with all her might.

She shouts at you, screams at you, curses at you, and still keeps pushing.

You don't let go. You can't let go.

She pounds her fists on your chest repeatedly. You gladly take the brunt and still don't relent.

You never once let go.

Finally her tired body slumps on you and she goes awfully quiet, silent, and unmoving.

You carry the over-exhausted woman and put her to bed.

Now it's your turn to drown, in private. You drink. It doesn't help.

Regina's heart-breaking face is now carved in to your memory. You wish to erase, obliterate it.

So you drink some more. It still doesn't help.

You are done feeling sad, done feeling sorry for Regina, for yourself.

Now you are infuriated. Enraged, livid, at yourself, at that stupid doctor, at the world. You are furious at everything.

You suddenly can't breathe. You can't move a muscle at will.

You realize you broke your vows today.

That disgusting, wretched bulge of bile forces its way ahead. You rush to the washroom.

The contents of your stomach hurl out of you forcefully. You dry heave a few times, but there is nothing left inside you.

Metaphorically and literally.

You wryly think, Regina isn't the only one feeling sterile and barren today.

You are disgusted with yourself in the next moment; there is no comparing your pain with her loss.

You were supposed to destroy all the harm in Regina's way.

You wrecked the only woman you vowed to protect.

You broke the only woman you vowed to cherish.

Today you became the harm. You became the pain.

You became Regina's destruction.

You rectify. You chose to become Regina's destruction.

You doubt things will ever be the same.

No, you know things will never be the same.

You glance at the band on your ring finger. It's mocking you, your prologue with misfortune, taunting at your helplessness.

Maybe '_forever_' is just that. A day to day simple word.

* * *

**I sincerely hope it was worth your time. **

**Your feedback will be very much appreciated. **

**Thank you all.**


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